Retreat Parenting Ourselves
with Susan Bögels and George Langenberg
In a beautiful place, at De Hoorneboeg
This 5-day mindfulness retreat is in line with the Buddhist/mindfulness tradition. Susan and George are both mindfulness teachers, trained in MBSR, MBCT, and Buddhism, George is also a yoga teacher and acupuncturist and Susan is a psychotherapist and professor of Mindfulness. With our teachings we want to connect the body, the heart and the psyche.
During this retreat with the theme of the relationship with our inner child, we explore, as Thich Nhat Hanh calls it: “The roots of our suffering.”
In this retreat we carefully examine the relationship with our inner child. The theme of the retreat is ‘parenting ourselves’. The way we ourselves were raised (by our parents, siblings, teachers, grandparents, etc.) affects not only the relationship with our own children and grandchildren, but also the relationships we have with partners, colleagues, friends, clients, students. And most importantly: the relationship with ourselves
- 12 to 16 November 2023 (4 nights)
Our Inner Child
We explore how our inner parent responds to this child and how they provide for the needs of this inner child. In each of us there is an inner parent who, from the moment we are born (and before), connects with our inner child. Just as our parents and others have bonded with us, so we can take care of what our own inner child needs as best we can. We build and strengthen new ways to take care of ourselves.
As children, we “internalized” the way our parents reacted to us. For example, the reaction we got when we were hungry, happy, sad, angry or afraid. Or if we couldn’t sleep or slept. If we passed a test or failed it. By internalizing that reaction, we made their behavior “ours.” Their behavior has gone inward, become a part of us. But is this really who we are and who we want to be? For the rest of our lives we spend a certain amount of time trying to find that inner child, the “I” under layers and layers of learned behavior. The Zen Buddhist concept of the “beginners’ mind” helps to find our inner child.
In a retreat, by being in silence with ourselves, and meditating, we meet our inner child again. The chatter of the mind diminishes. We feel pure and raw emotions and use our senses again the way children do. In a retreat we can again intensely enjoy food or the nature around us. We become playful again. We cherish the subtle moments when we are in contact with all living beings around us. Therefore, during a retreat we can sometimes feel vulnerable, almost naked like babies.
Real change begins in the body. The body is our home in this life, the body is the place where we hold emotions and early childhood memories. Processes that we work through during these days continue to flow as we notice how our bodies resonates with them. Mindful Yoga is therefore an important part of the retreat.
If deeper layers are touched, then it is important that we can land in the body. Not by weighting, but by moving along and letting the body unlock itself. With lightness we can touch an experience. At these moments, the body is allowed to lead and we can land in softness.
The yoga we do is a welcome exercise of physical exertion and relaxation. The head takes a break, although our overcontrolling ‘mind’ makes attempts to determine the story. But the body knows what’s needed there and then. We don’t want to move around that, we deal with loving attention, sometimes with physical discomfort or emotional pain. For example, yoga can be a compassion exercise for the whole consciousness, physically, mentally and emotionally.
- 1375,- for a double room
- 12 to 16 November 2023 (4 nights)
Susan Bögels is a psychotherapist, mindfulness teacher and professor. She provides mindfulness training for parents and children to professionals worldwide. She publishes on mindful parenting and mindfulness for children.
George Langenberg is an acupuncturist and teaches yoga and meditation classes in Haarlem. He is supervisor and trainer of mindfulness and yoga teachers. In 2013 he wrote a children’s book on mindfulness and compassion.
You are now on George’s website
Five Day Retreat
Midweek in Silence
This 5-day retreat consists of sitting and walking meditation, yoga, work meditation (45 min per day) and ‘reparenting’ exercises. Once a day there is half an hour of ‘Insight Dialogue’ in duos. During the week there is four times the opportunity to share experiences and ask questions with one of the trainers for 10 minutes.
Silence is not just a rule of retreat but a practice within the practice that helps us turn our attention inward and recognize the quality of our inner eyes and ears. This retreat is completely silent.
Example of the day program
*Informal meditation involves mindful looking, listening, feeling, standing, sitting, lying down, moving, walking, showering, taking a nap, playing, etc. All in attention and silence.
A beautiful retreat in the middle of nature
During this midweek there is a chef who cooks Ayurvedic for us every day. After the last meditation you can use the sauna in the evening. The entire location is spacious, large enough to be able to withdraw from the group, or to get a breath of fresh air for a walk on the heath or in the forest.
You are welcome on Sunday evening from 18.00h. to install you and explore the place. The first meditation, and the silence, starts at 19.00h.
Before the start of the retreat you can, at your own expense, have a meal in the restaurant nearby.
We stay five nights at the Hoorneboeg. From Monday to Friday we use all meals there.
All bedrooms are on the first floor and each bedroom has its own shower and toilet. After the day program you can use the sauna.
Practice and Silence
Silence is an important condition for a retreat. We are there in a beautiful place where we take care of the silence together. Together we observe the silence so that everyone can focus on the practice.
Exchange of experiences takes place during the ‘Insight Dialogue’ on the basis of a question. For that moment we break the silence and meditatively we speak and listen.
We ask you to turn off the mobile phone. In case of an emergency, you can always be reached for the home front via the telephone of one of the supervisors.
Dates and Times
Start on Sunday afternoon, walk-in from 18:00h. (the retreat starts at 19:00h.)
Retreat 2023 ends on Thursday late afternoon.
There are three vegetarian meals a day. Lunch is a hot meal. If you follow an adapted diet, we would like to hear from you when you sign up.
Please note that the retreat starts on Sunday evening at 19:00h. No meal is served that night.
On Friday afternoon, the retreat ends after lunch.
The price of the retreat consists of 3 parts, costs for stay, costs for meals + a ‘fee’ for the attendants.
After your registration you will receive an invoice with VAT from George Langenberg
Certification Association for Mindfulness Trainers
The program of this retreat has been found suitable as a re-registration retreat for the VMBN
The VVM accredits this retreat as a 5 day course for regular registration.
The Hoorneboeg is easily accessible, also by public transport. The location is just south of Hilversum. From the A27 you are there by car within 5 minutes.
From Hilversum station you can cycle to De Hoorneboeg in 15 minutes and from Hollandsche Rading station it is even closer. A taxi ride takes about 10 minutes from Hilversum station. Buses stop at Utrechtseweg (Hoorneboeg stop) at the beginning of the driveway.
On the website of the Hoorneboeg you will also find extensive directions for public transport: https://www.dehoorneboeg.nl/contact/