It is January 12 as I write this, and I returned last night from the Parenting Ourselves immersion weekend, which I facilitate annually together with Susan Bögels. The people who participate in this weekend have previously attended our five day retreat. During this weekend, we deepened the model, introduced new exercises, and took participants along in our own learning process.
It was a cold weekend, but we had a wonderful time together in the snow. On Saturday, we went for a walk in the dark forest before sunrise. During these days, we enjoyed a white covered Hoorneboeg and the delicious meals prepared by Marianne.
Witnessing the Internal Family – IFS and Trauma Work
The theme of this weekend was Witness to the Internal Family. We shared IFS (Internal Family Systems) exercises that Susan and I had previously learned during a workshop with Richard Schwartz. And we used these IFS exercises to touch upon deep trauma work.
I AM Meditation and the Practice of Witnessing
In addition, I shared parts of the I AM meditation that I learned from my guru over the past months. In this meditation, “being a witness” brings a different perspective.
You can be a witness to your thoughts, to physical sensations, and to consciousness itself. This raises a philosophical question: who is the one who perceives consciousness? Going even deeper, everything that appears and disappears is temporary and therefore not real. That which is unchanging and eternal is the deepest truth. Can you fully dissolve into that which is unchanging? Because that is where you arrive at your deepest essence.
The Inner Parent and the Self in Parenting Ourselves
Your deepest essence is what in IFS is called the greater Self. In the Parenting Ourselves method, this is your inner parent. The relationship with this inner parent is often not strongly developed, and one way to strengthen this internal part is through meditation.
Book: Parenting Ourselves
Would you like to know more about Parenting Ourselves? In April, Susan’s book Parenting Our-selves will be published in Dutch, with the beautiful subtitle, translated: How to Become Your Own Secure Attachment Figure.
You can pre-order this Dutch title via this link:https://www.boom.nl/psychologie/100-20062_Parenting-ourselves
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